Freak
Spot
Today's Freaks
Week's
Freaks
1
2
Month's
Freaks
1
2
Year's
Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
2009
Freaks
1
2
3
4
5
6
Sarasota County Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
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Charges
Thomas Turner was arrested for Shoplifting in Maricopa county
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Charges
Rynda Partida was charged with Trespassing in Multnomah county
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Charges
Lyndsey Brooke was charged with Possession of Oxycodone and Grand Theft in Pasco county
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Despite what he would like you to believe, this wasn't the first time
Thomas had an attempted grab-n-go that was thwarted by a sliding glass
door...
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The 1980s called, and Rynda they want their “look”
back. |
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If Lyndsey asks you if you want to see her Hurracanrana, the answer is no... Officer Bob learned this the hard way!
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Worst case of “Face Frost-bite,” EVER!
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Wow, it's like Cyndi Lauper meets Tecumseh meets Cell Block 4. |
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That’s Lyndsey’s problem, her shirt condones wrestling in a church! Nothing good can come from wrestling in a
Chapel! |
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Frost-bite??? You were really reaching there.
ASSHOLIO
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That is one serious bad ass chick. She could kick my ass. That eyebrow gets my
attention though. What letter is that in Morse Code ? It's a "K" for Killer ???
Woodsterman
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The hurracanrana sounds like a hell of a time, I don't know if I'd respect her in the morning, but who cares!
ASSHOLIO
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I've always said, tits look a lot nicer pressed against the window than a face.
FAT TEDDY
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I lived in the 80's and don't remember anyone looking like that. Well, Boy George did look kind of similar.
FAT TEDDY
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Lyndsey should have learned from all the priests getting in trouble for chapel wrestling.
JIMBOJOHNSON
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More like Worst case of "Smushed Face" EVER!
THENEWGUY
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I'm thinking a Dongage Factor of... 2?
sweattybetty
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I thought wrestlers did roids, so their balls wouldn't get in the way. What are the pain pills for?
Pool Boy
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He looks like he got kicked in the face by a mule!
JIMBOJOHNSON
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She's looks just like this whore from Vice city I slept with, then instead of paying her, I beat her and took all of her money!
THENEWGUY
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She's
kind of cute... I'm going to choose to believe she was "taken advantage
of" by an even hotter corrections officer in the shower...
FAT TEDDY
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Freak
Spots
Today's Freaks
Week's
Freaks
1
2
Month's
Freaks
1
2
Year's
Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
2009
Freaks
1
2
3
4
5
6
Sarasota County Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
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Charges
Artemio Jiminez was arrested for Resisting Arrest with Physical Force in Maricopa county
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Charges
Irene Speicher was charged with Soliciting For Prostitution in Pinellas county
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Artemio just got a glimpse of the season 2 premier of The Jersey Shore... Spoiler Alert... Snookie's got a dong!
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Irene's sales pitch... The best 25¢ you'll ever spend!
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Right before the officer took the picture, Artemio
thought he caught a glimpse of a chupacabra in the corner. |
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REALLY!? Who
would pay for THAT?!?!?
Irene's sales are WAY down, hey, times are tough out there. I say we
help her out! Send us in some new slogans that Irene can use, and we'll
send the person who submits the one we like best a FreakSmack.com
bumper sticker!
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I knew that Snookie was broad shouldered, but a dong? Say it ain't so Freak... Say it ain't so.
LITTLEORALANNIE
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"My teeth come out!"
LITTLEORALANNIE
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What the fuck is a Snookie?
ASSHOLIO
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Let me suck your cock, because meth's a hell of a drug.
Lana
Gramlich
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Snookie wouldn't refer to her schlong as a dong, she'd call it "Da BONE!".
THENEWGUY
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Just like McDonalds, Change back from your dollar.
lotgk
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That wasn't a chupacabra... Though some people have called it a beast.
Pool Boy
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They call me lumberjack!
Anonymous
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Freak
Spot
Today's Freaks
Week's
Freaks
1
2
Month's
Freaks
1
2
Year's
Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
2009
Freaks
1
2
3
4
5
6
Sarasota County Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
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Charges
Mitchell Brazier was arrested for Carrying a Concealed Weapon in Multnomah county
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Charges
Floyd Davis was charged with Disorderly Conduct in Montgomery county
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Charges
Jason
Rizzuto was charged with Crimes Against Person-Corrupt By Threat-
Public Servant Or Family, and Burglary of Unoccupied Structure in
Palm Beach county
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Mitchell
was just as surprised as the cops that he had a shank hidden in his
hair, they also found two paper-clips, a Sammy Sosa rookie card, and a
chicken wing on a string.
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Floyd,
just because you look like Doc from "Back to the Future" doesn't mean
you have the right to climb all over your town's clock tower shouting
1.21 gigawatts? 1.21 gigawatts? Great Scott! at the top of your lungs
during a thunderstorm...
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Jason gave the children at the YMCA two options, either join his gang,
the tiger brows, or he was going to kick their asses. I know Jason... I
know... It ain't right 10 year olds having cell phones. |
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When half your face looks like actor Josh Hartnett,
and the other half looks like a Rastafarian, Mitchell has to carry a gun. Case dismissed! |
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Of
course Floyd is pissed off! He just woke
up from a 25 year nap. When he fell
asleep 25 years ago, Soul Train was still on TV and Michael Jackson was still
black (WHAT? To soon?).
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When Jason wanted you to shave your eyebrows to match his, and you declined, he
insisted by saying that this would better on you than your dog… |
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Ain't no thang but a chicken wang on a strang!
THENEWGUY
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Wait wait wait... When was Michael Jackson black?
ASSHOLIO
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TIGER BROW IN DA HIZZY!
THENEWGUY |
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Is it too much to ask for a white-trash mustache warning next time?
Pool Boy
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What the hell's a gigawatt?
ASS
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My dog doesn't have eyebrows!
Pool Boy |
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Mitchell looks nothing like Josh Hartnett!
LITTLEORALANNIE
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Looks as if Floyd may have gotten into the chronic.
Me-Me
King
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Now they're going to give him a striped suit too... I'm not so sure that Jason isn't going to view this as funishment!
Dr. Spliffington |
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I wouldn't mind having that Sammy Sosa rookie card. It WAS worth a lot of money.
JIMBOJOHNSON
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My ten year old had a cellphone, you know, "just for emergencies", it
was great until she texted to give $10 to Haiti 100 times. She later
said she wanted to help with the emergency in Haiti and didn't know it
was my money she was giving them... Yeah, she's a blond
FAT TEDDY
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Freak
Spot
Today's Freaks
Week's
Freaks
1
2
Month's
Freaks
1
2
Year's
Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
2009
Freaks
1
2
3
4
5
6
Sarasota County Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
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Charges
Robert Wallace was charged with Resisting Arrest in Maricopa county
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Charges
Winston James was charged with Contempt Of Court in Orange county
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Robert wasn't resisting, he's a narcoleptic. He's innocent... INNOCENT!
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Winston didn’t mean to be late for court, he had trouble getting through the
metal detector.
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Robert, being true to his Drag-Queen name “Dorothy”, is in his mind
clicking his heels and chanting, “There’s no place like home!”
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Nice job geting arrested "Winston". Or should I call you by your REAL name???
TIGER!
That's
right! You heard it here first folks, not from The National Enquirer,
the Star, the Globe, the Weekly News, TMZ, or even that douche licker
Perez Hilton. You got your news from FreakSmack.com! You see, Tiger's
had a hard time getting around the greater Orlando area without being
noticed so he's adopted a disguise. A disguise that neither the
paparazi, or the Florida Sate Troopers would ever think Tiger was cool
enough to pull off. But the FREAK spotted him, the FREAK knows Tiger's
cool... You have to be cool to be crankin' down 16 chicks at once!
Somebody Get this Man a Gatorade!
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IT LOOKS LIKE HIS FACE IS MELTING... MELLLTINNG... MEEEELLLITNG
LITTLEORALANNIE
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Tiger isn't that cool... I bet he cried out for his momma when they peirced his ass!
ASS
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| He looks like the bad guys from Batman Begins.
JIMBOJOHNSON |
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Great call, Freak Smack. They both have the same intensity. But Tiger, man, get
yourself a better weave. I could do better with a hank of yard from Michaels.
lifeshighway
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Sherrif Joe doesn't stand for perps taking cat-naps in his squad cars.
ASS
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What’s the differenece between Tiger Woods and Magic Johnson???
HIV
THENEWGUY
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Another classic case of accordion face!
FAT TEDDY
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One of the women who claims she slept with Tiger Woods says they never talked
about golf while having sex. However, contractually Tiger was obligated to talk
about Nike, Gatorade and American Express.
Stole it from Conan
ASSHOLIO
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Freak
Spot
Today's Freaks
Week's
Freaks
1
2
Month's
Freaks
1
2
Year's
Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
2009
Freaks
1
2
3
4
5
6
Sarasota County Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
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Charges
Robert Russel was charged with Wanton Endangerment in Fayette county
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Charges
Robert Love Violated his Probation in Orange county
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Charges
Donald Pulmann was arrested for Driving on a Suspended License in Montgomery county
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| Robert
kept wanted the doctor to check his tonsils. Unfortunately for
him, he was at the sheriff’s department. Don’t worry Robert,
someone on the inside will be more than happy to check your tonsils.
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Robert's got a lot of Love to give, thank God he's not trying to give it to me!
Dongage Factor : 10
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Donald still can’t figure out how the cops saw him
drive drunk. He was wearing camouflage
and everything!
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LOOKOUT! He's after the Wanton soup again!
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Robert, when you were down on your luck and your
friend Mike suggested that there is always Prostitution, he was making a
joke.
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Donald
took the officer's advice, and is thinking long and hard about what he
did wrong, next time he'll paint the truck camouflage too!
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Robert's
doing stretching exercises for when he meets up with Jimbo the Jumbo in
the joint. Nobody likes teeth, so it's just the courteous thing to do.
ASSHOLIO
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DEAR LORD! I will pay good money to keep this man away from me!
Pool Boy
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Donald may want to consider camouflaging the middle of his head.
Pool Boy
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It just never stops, these guys just keep leaving themselves WIDE OPEN. Down the
hatch Robert.
Woodsterman
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Some jokes just aren't funny.
THENEWGUY
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Does Donald have eyes? Or are there just holes there?
ASS
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That is just sad, someone throw him a fish.
lifeshighway
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Robert
looks like one of those guys who'd keep you locked in a cellar for 20
years and force you to watch him perform daily meat dress fashion shows
FAT TEDDY
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He should get camouflage tattooed over his entire body, the man who does that will be famous, might as well be Donald.
HUNGDOOBIE
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Maybe,
since there was a camera, he thought this was his chance to audition
for American Idol. His rendition of "Thirty Days In The Hole" only
brought a smattering of applause.
Me-Me
King
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I'm giving him a Dongage Factor of 11
(Don't take the free candy!)
HUNGDOOBIE
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The problem is the truck... What Donald needs is a jetpack... You don't need a license for a jetpack.
FAT TEDDY
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Freak
Spot
Today's Freaks
Week's
Freaks
1
2
Month's
Freaks
1
2
Year's
Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
2009
Freaks
1
2
3
4
5
6
Sarasota County Freaks
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
|
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Charges
John Tiara was arrested for Not Paying his Child Support in Pinellas county
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Charges
Alexisa Walema was arrested for Theft, Robbery, and Assault in Multnomah county
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Remember John?
He's the guy that spent his weekend in Hernando county jail for
Contempt of court, well while he was there, officers decided to check
and see if he was wanted anywhere else, and low and behold he's wanted
in Pinellas county for not paying child support. Chalk another one up
to the internet. As for John, well, that lucky bastard is saving a ton
on his electric bill by not being home.
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Alexisa???
Just 5 days ago you were arrested as Alexas. Either Multnomah county
doesn't check the Identification of people they arrest, or you Ma'am
are an imposter!!! Or a twin... Either way, she's got a Dongage Factor : 9
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There is no way in hell that someone had kids with
this guy!!! |
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Theft, robbery, AND assault! Make up your mind Alexisa (if that's your real name), are you gonna steal
shit or beat shit up!!! |
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I know him ... he pissed himself in Target
Woodsterman
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He/She is kicking the shit out of his/her Johns and then robbing them when
he/she should be rubbing them. I'm so confused ...
Woodsterman
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LUCKY BASTARD! If he spends the rest of his life in jail he'll never have to werk again!
THENEWGUY |
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Multnomah county is only about an hour's drive from me. I'm scared now...
innominatus
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I bet they shipped him off to Pinellas county because they were sick of the whistling.
HUNGDOOBIE
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Alexisa has perfected his/her "look". It is always ready for its
close-up.
Love the Dongage scale.
lifeshighway
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I wish he'd get out of jail so we can go stumpin'.
HUNGDOOBIE
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You need some audio of a DONGGGGGGG to go with the Dongage Factor!
Pool Boy
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